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| GUESS Where I AM ? Left side-right side, Upper row ? lower row? Answer in comments below ! |
Did I have a happy childhood??
Me : 'NO, I had a normal one'
I was 11, it was free time in school, I was playing with other kids in the field. The bell rang it was time to go back, our class teacher came to the field and we all stood in a line according to our roll numbers. My new class Teacher came near me and asked me gently " I have heard you are staying with your mother. Your father comes to visit you sometime during school hours. Next time he comes, ask him to meet me".
This was not the end, all school teachers were so much interested in knowing my parents marital status, they always kept calling me to staff room, or canteen to discuss the updates.The worst being, during class hours when we were all given to write something, teacher would call out my name. For next few minutes I would be standing in front of her desk, with all my classmates hearing our conversation about 'What went wrong? Why my parents are not together? With whom I stay?...etc
This continuous interrogation made me feel like an outcast, I started feeling nervous, all my classmates knew what was going on. That time I didn't understand that it was not my fault. I hated that feeling of always being questioned and discussed by my school teachers.
I guess, their intentions were good, but the method wasn't. I never visited my school again till date. But now I have decided to go back and tell the present teachers not to repeat the same mistake with any other child.
I don't know what to say today after reading this....but it feels good to know that you want to go back and tell them so that at least no one else suffers and that's a great thing .
ReplyDeleteHeart warming post and emotional touch. It touched the heart and many fail to realize how much it affects innocent children. RESPECT for writing on it as part of the challenge.
ReplyDeleteVery Honest Post
ReplyDeleteI loved this post...especially that first line. You had a normal childhood. With its ups and downs. Very heartfelt post. The mannerin which teachers dealt with parental separation is atrocious. It's technically none of their business unless it was affecting you emotionally and behaviourally at school.
ReplyDeletePeople are curious by nature. They do not understand what the child might go through in her little heart. I find the fact very disturbing. I guess people should know to keep their curiosities under tight control. I feel angry that you had teachers who didn't understand how they made you feel.
ReplyDeleteThat was not an appropriate way to handle the situation. The teacher should have known better.
ReplyDelete@Ananya : Are you second from right in 2nd row from down... Not sure.. I have no clue....
ReplyDeleteNOPE !
DeleteNice post and great choice for the letter C! Nice to meet you. New follower :)
DeleteThanks Siv, its my honor to gain you as a new friend :)
DeleteWell - people are natually curious about other people's lives. Even in blogging, you will see people are excited about blogs that lay out their personal life for public entertainment. The teachers in school those days were lowly paid and not really qualified in child psychology and stuff. So they must have been like any roadside aunty. Teachers will probably be more sophesticated in the expensive international schools of today. But not everyone can afford such schools, can they?
ReplyDeleteHey, I don't think any blogger lays out his/her personal life for PUBLIC ENTERTAINMENT. Its never easy to remember your bitter experiences and then write about it.
DeleteI studied in an convent high school, second best in my city. Its not about understanding child psychology, its just common sense.
Very sensitive issue.. no matter what the intentions are, sometimes the methods put the children in uncomfortable positions..
ReplyDeleteGS at Moontime Tunes
Sensitive issues, Ananya. I appreciate the way you've spoken about it here, and the way you say you would like to go back and tell them not to repeat this. This would be a very positive gesture. I understand the pain it much have caused you. But as usual, you're positive, Stay that way !! :)
ReplyDeleteIt's sad how out of curiosity people hurt others. I think we need to respect others privacy
ReplyDeleteI dont know what to say...but your guts and positivism amaze me... and no I dont think your teachers' intentions were any good
ReplyDeleteAre u third from right in second row? I can not say I understand the plea but I can imagine how confusing it can be for a child to go through all this.
ReplyDeleteYupp :) Am surprised you guessed it right .. cos so many of my friends who see me daily fail to spot me :)
DeleteDear, you deserve a big hug! First for penning up so brilliantly, second for being honest with the post! I wonder if I would have penned up this honestly! Anyways, a good read :)
ReplyDelete~Smile, it makes (y)our day!
S(t)ri
Participant|AtoZ Challenge 2014
third from right with short hair. if that is not you then you are not in this pic,. :).
ReplyDeleteyou know the mentality of people. practically speaking, going back and telling them is not an option but yes, going forward we can make sure we build a better world for our kids so that they can pass on the same message. i have always admired you for what you are. even though these are the bitter experiences but you have learnt to categorize these exeperiences into good and bad.. and that matters a lot.. kkep up the good work girl :)
OMG ! How did you guess it right?? :)
DeleteYes I am sitting in lower row, third girl from Right end .
Thank you !
U have a broad forhead and straight hair with big eyes!!! And it is not a tough task to guess your old buddy
DeleteThat is a very tough situation to go through. I commend you for bring able to write about this experience. Good luck in all that you do and stay focused and full of faith.
ReplyDeleteThat is a very tough situation to go through. I commend you for bring able to write about this experience. Good luck in all that you do and stay focused and full of faith.
ReplyDeleteThat was an ugly way to deal with the situation. How callous of them! Good you have decided to go back and let them knw!
ReplyDeleteVery bold post. People can't come out like this. And your initiative to go back to school is commendable.
ReplyDeleteThat is indeed ruthless. How come grown up teachers treat a child like this. I'm proud of your decision!
ReplyDeleteOh God, what kind of teachers were they if they were so insensitive. If they meant any good, they wouldn't have questioned you so many times, and knowing the class can hear you talk... too bad. It's a good idea to go back to school and have a work so that no other child has to face this.
ReplyDeletehonest post indeed ! r u 4th one frm left ? lower row :)
ReplyDeleteThat was actually insensitive of the teachers! Hugs dear!
ReplyDeleteSo touching..sometimes even good intentions can end up in the wrong colour...
ReplyDeleteRandom Thoughts Naba
It is really awful when we have such insensitive teachers. Aren't they supposed to be our role models? And I think the worst part is that even today you can find such instances. I know that from some experiences in my own family. I hope you will be able to help those teachers see some light when you go back there to talk about it. You must do it.
ReplyDeletei am glad u got ovr it n decided to tell ur teachers nt to do the same :-) way to go :-)
ReplyDeletehere is my c post :-) do stop by :-)
http://swathishenoy.blogspot.in/2014/04/c-for-care.html?m=1
I think most of our teachers (or most of the people I should say ) lack sensitivity. They just want to know the gossip and just because it;s a child, it does not mean that the child does not feel. In fact when parents' separate it;s the most difficult time for a child. You should have asked the teacher's to mind their own business, at least if you couldn't then you could say it now;)
ReplyDeletevery pertinent remarks..
DeleteI loved that you're going to go back and tell them not to repeat it to any other child. When my brother was in 7th grade he religious got the lowest marks for English... how much I try... he just won't improve and his teacher's approach just made the situation worse. And now, in another school, under another teacher, he's the highest for the same! Teachers do make a difference in our life!
ReplyDeleteExactly ! I am happy for ur brother.
DeleteMy high school teachers were really good I still admire them, but not sure why few were so insensitive.
I know how that must have felt. I lost my mother and post that my dad remarried, I faced a similar situation. They need to understand how sensitive a child is in that state...
ReplyDeleteRicha
Richa am sorry to hear that.
DeleteWhat a painful thing to go through, especially for a young child. I am sorry you went through that. And yes, I am glad you are going back to ensure that they never do this to other kids. Good for you!
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to hear you had to go through this at school. I am shocked the teachers would do this! I understand curiosity, but they should be supportive not making you feel secluded!!
ReplyDeleteSo sad, your teachers were very insensitive. They need to be told how wrong they were to meddle in your life, good that you are going to let them know it.
ReplyDeleteAnanya,
ReplyDeleteI think your work is done.......
You have passed on this message to so many people...with your crude honesty.......
Smile.....hugs.....
Nice post and nice message passed on. You for sure have to visit your teachers to let them know.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely insensitive and tactless of them! You have been very brave. God bless!
ReplyDeleteYou are doing the right thing by telling them that they should try to be sensitive to feelings of others especially children.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately intelligent people don't become teachers! And we can't choose our parents!
ReplyDeleteYes you are right their intentions were good but the methods were wrong...hope this message will help the ones in need....
ReplyDeleteTeachers can be very insensitive. I salute you for the last line- wanting to go back to tell the present teachers not to do this... The pain can only be known by the one who has experienced.
ReplyDeleteThe curiosity makes a person behave irrationally.
ReplyDeleteyep next time if u go dont forget to express but most of us get insensitive which over powers our curiosity
ReplyDeleteIt takes courage to face it and more courage to write and blog about it. Hats off to you. :) On a lighter note I just wrote a post about childhood :) :D
ReplyDeleteI hate how anybody gets to call themselves "teachers". I'm sorry that you had to go through this. I wish we had more sensitivity training than bookish information
ReplyDeleteWhat absolute busybodies!! They had no business to constantly question you like that! I'm so sorry you had to go through that!
ReplyDeleteHats off to you girl! For wanting to make a change and trying to spare others the pain you went through.
ReplyDeleteEvery one has their reasons for their decisions and actions but life always gives you courage to face what lies ahead.
Health and Happiness Always.
http://inderpreetkaur.blogspot.in/2014/04/color-not-kind-i-like.html
Thank you alllllllllllll for your heart felt comments.
ReplyDeleteI can think of so many things that I could have said to my teachers now, but back then I just couldn't.
DeleteMy classmates of my own age were more sensible, they never asked me such questions, which were asked by my teachers.
I am happy that you didn't let those events of life hamper you as a person and you turned out great... you know what, I used to be bullied by other students till my 10th standard but I made a decision that I won't become a rebel sort of because of this. I made great friends in college and forgot the bad experience of school.. and like you I never visited my school again too...
ReplyDeletethanks for this post... :)
Amritt
Good story, and I agree, that was a terrible approach by the teachers. No one should expect the child to play mediator and informant into a private relationship.
ReplyDeletebeautiful memories :) .. cant say which one is you .. but you can be the one in the 3rd row 3rd or 4th child from right of computer screen .. since haven't seen any pic of your .. just implying from your previous post .. " a child who is trying hard to not show the chipped front tooth' :P
ReplyDeleteI can understand what you went through. I was in a similar situation like yours but none of my teachers ever asked me anything. It was the other way...I told my teachers to tell my dad not to come and visit me in the school...but going back and telling them is a bold thing to do..good luck
ReplyDeleteremembered by childhood too... tell me the secret as to how to get more comments .. i dont get many
ReplyDeleteFelt sad reading this. But your decision is right. You should tell them this is not the right method.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletesome teachers are bad.. it is sad but truth.. I have even worse experience even when my family was at par social rules and my school was the best school in town.. still.. it has left a bad mark in my memories to be etched forever.. and i consider it as my dark past something I hardly feel like sharing as i dnt want to buy sympathy.. ur post prompted me to open my heart here otherwise i dnt discuss it with anyone except my husband..
ReplyDelete